Almost Three.

In a week, Ellie will turn three.  The past year has been big for her.  She finally started to walk.  She started to talk in real phrases.  She started school.

As I'm writing this, I am watching Ellie watch her absolute favorite DVD, the "Treeschoolers Incredible Insects."  As she grabbed the DVD case and said "Twee-school insects!" I was reminded that three years ago, I spent plenty of time sitting right here on my couch, waiting for this little girl to arrive.

I remember being scared.

Scared of being a mom.  Scared of being a special needs mom.  Scared of being a NICU mom.  Scared of being the mom of a little one with a lot of medical needs.  Scared of heart surgery.

And yes, being a mom is scary.  Matt and I are in charge of this adorable little person who absolutely trusts us.  Being a special needs mom is scary, but mostly, it's just being a mom.  Sometimes it's really hard.  Sometimes, it's no big deal.  Today after school, Ellie was in rare form.  She threw two boxes off the front porch by the time I unlocked the door.  She helped herself to several "juice boxes" of almond milk.  She dumped out my water bottle.  She had some time outs today. But she is hardly the little medically fragile girl who came home from the hospital when she was three weeks old.  When she dances throughout dinner, I need to pause and remember the girl who could hardly keep her eyes open before her heart surgery.  The child who wakes up at 5 telling Mommy to get coffee and asking for hugs from her stuffed animals has a strong heart.

I am thankful.

How is this girl nearly three?

Newborn.

One.

Two.

Her party this year doesn't have a theme yet.  I haven't made cake pops.  But we will still gather with some friends and celebrate this little girl, we will laugh and we will be thankful for our spirited Ellie.